Why ADHD Paralysis Keeps Coming Back And How to Heal It
You know the pattern. You spend the morning frozen, scrolling, wanting to move, not moving. Then something shifts, and suddenly you're in a whirlwind, getting three things done in a panic. Then you crash. Back on the couch, wondering why this keeps happening.
That freeze-frantic cycle is your nervous system running a program it genuinely believes is keeping you safe. And the short-term fixes most of us rely on are quietly making it worse.
This episode is about why ADHD paralysis in adults is so hard to break, what's driving it, and what it looks like to start healing it at the root instead of just hacking your way through another afternoon.
Here's what we cover:
Why ADHD paralysis pulls you into survival mode, and why your brain biologically can't think past the immediate moment when you're stuck
How guilt, deadlines, shame spirals, and urgency seem to work in the moment, but are training your nervous system to need more intensity just to function
The freeze-frantic cycle explained: why you keep swinging between total shutdown and frantic productivity, and why that swing gets worse over time
Why common ADHD productivity strategies like racing timers, hype music, and catastrophizing consequences can deepen dysregulation without you even realizing it
The real reason task initiation is hard, and why it gets easier when you address regulation first
What nervous system regulation means for ADHDers and why it's the thing that unlocks productivity
Why ADHD symptoms like paralysis, overwhelm, and executive functioning struggles are not fixed and can genuinely improve with the right long-term approach
This one is for you if you've tried the tips, the hacks, the systems, and you're still ending up on the couch, wondering why nothing sticks. If you're ambitious, you know what you want to do, and yet getting started feels impossible on a regular basis, this episode will reframe everything.
"Survival mode is not protecting you. It is exhausting you."
Jenna's free live workshop on April 29th, Get Unstuck for Good: Healing ADHD Paralysis at the Root, goes even deeper on what's driving your freeze and what it looks like to start addressing it at the source. Grab your spot!
Connect with Jenna
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Get out of paralysis, be more productive, and enjoy your life again! Join an upcoming group!
More about ADHD with Jenna
ADHD with Jenna Free is a podcast for adults with ADHD who are done surviving their symptoms and ready to start thriving with ADHD without the endless tips, hacks, and workarounds that have never really fixed anything.
Hosted by Jenna Free, a Canadian Certified Counselor (CCC) and ADHD therapist, this show exists to give you a completely different way of understanding ADHD in adults and the signs of ADHD in women. Because the reason you're stuck, overwhelmed, and exhausted isn't a lack of willpower, it's that your brain is running in fight or flight. And once you understand that, everything changes.
This podcast covers the full experience of living with adult ADHD: the real science behind procrastination in ADHD and ADHD task paralysis, ADHD executive functioning strategies that work, why ADHD and perimenopause collide in ways no one talks about, and the honest, solution-focused conversations that most ADHD podcasts aren't having. Jenna also shares her own story, what it looks like to go from chronically dysregulated to genuinely thriving, so you can see that this is possible for you.
This show gives women with ADHD, and anyone who has ever wondered whether ADHD can be diagnosed in adulthood, a path forward that isn't about coping harder, but healing.
I’ll answer questions like:
Do I have ADHD?
What is ADHD task paralysis, and how do I get unstuck?
Why is my ADHD getting worse in my 40s?
What does ADHD and perimenopause do to your brain?
How do I manage ADHD emotional dysregulation without medication alone?
Why do I procrastinate so much with ADHD?
Why don't ADHD tips and tricks ever work long-term?
What does it look like to thrive with ADHD
Can you heal ADHD symptoms without just white-knuckling through life?
What does nervous system regulation have to do with ADHD?
How do I stop feeling overwhelmed with ADHD?
If you're an adult with ADHD who's tired of the commiseration and ready for a show that believes your life can look completely different, you're in the right place.
The unedited transcript for this episode of ADHD with Jenna
ADHD Paralysis
Jenna Free [00:00:00 - 00:01:00]: This episode is brought to you by my upcoming free workshop called Get Unstuck for Good. [00:00:19] This is where we're really going to be looking at ADHD paralysis and healing it at the root. [00:00:25] So if you would like to dive into that topic with me, be sure to grab your spot. [00:00:29] The link is in the show notes. [00:00:31] All right, so before we dive in, I would invite you, whether you've been here for a while or if you're brand new welcome, to do a little moment of checking in with yourself. [00:00:42] How are you feeling? [00:00:44] Are your shoulders around your ears? [00:00:46] Are you holding your breath? [00:00:48] Are you multitasking right now? [00:00:49] Which is fine, but are you rushing while doing so? [00:00:53] Are you rushing to your car right now? [00:00:55] Are you quickly washing the dishes while listening to this? [00:00:59] No need to stop anything.Understanding ADHD Paralysis: The Stuck or Frantic Cycle
Jenna Free [00:01:00 - 00:01:26]: [00:01:00] We do want to see if we can slow down and be present with the task at hand. [00:01:06] So I'm sure you have felt this many times before where you finally get yourself moving. [00:01:11] All morning you were in freeze. [00:01:13] You might have been scrolling. [00:01:14] You wanted to be doing things but you could not do it. [00:01:17] But my gosh, finally this afternoon I got myself up. [00:01:20] I panicked, I pushed, I. [00:01:22] I got three things done in a whirlwind and then I crashed.Jenna Free [00:01:26 - 00:02:04]: [00:01:26] I'm back on the couch, frozen again, wondering why this keeps happening. [00:01:30] It seems that I'm either stuck or I'm frantic. [00:01:33] And today we're talking about why that cycle exists and what it's actually going to take to break it for good. [00:01:40] So why are short term fixes so seductive when you are struggling? [00:01:45] We are in the present, right? [00:01:46] So if I'm in paralysis, I'm on the couch right now. [00:01:50] And when I'm in that space, it feels urgent, like I have things I need to do right now. [00:01:55] I already feel like I'm behind and I need to catch up and nothing is moving. [00:01:59] So we get into this panic state. [00:02:01] And of course I want relief immediately.
The Biology of ADHD Paralysis
Jenna Free [00:02:05 - 00:02:36]: [00:02:05] When my brain is in this panic mode, it does biologically zoom in. [00:02:11] It focuses on the immediate moment and what I need right now to survive. [00:02:16] Of course we know that. [00:02:19] You know, being a paralysis on your couch, scrolling is not a life or death situation. [00:02:23] But our body doesn't know that. [00:02:25] Your nervous system only knows that this is stressful, this is not what I want to be doing. [00:02:29] And it feels trapped. [00:02:30] And so we do lose that time horizon where I can't really think about tomorrow, I can't think about next week.Jenna Free [00:02:36 - 00:03:10]: [00:02:36] I am just panicking about how I need to get moving right now. [00:02:39] And so this is a really normal response when we are feeling stuck and, and feeling that stress. [00:02:45] And the thing is those little fixes, they quote unquote, work, but that's kind of the problem. [00:02:52] So say you race the clock and you try to get some things done. [00:02:55] It's like, well, look at that. [00:02:57] Half an hour was actually really more productive than when I was trying to do it in a more balanced, sustainable way. [00:03:04] Or you pile on enough guilt that you finally send the email. [00:03:08] Right? [00:03:08] That email is hanging over my head for two weeks.
Jenna Free [00:03:10 - 00:03:36]: [00:03:10] I finally felt so bad about not sending it and I was feeling so guilty that motivated me to get into action. [00:03:19] Or I wait until the deadline and damn, doesn't that just work? [00:03:22] Like, I've been struggling to work on this report for two weeks. [00:03:26] I'm trying, I'm trying, I'm trying. [00:03:28] I have no movement forward. [00:03:29] I haven't even opened the document. [00:03:31] But it's sure been hanging over my head. [00:03:32] I've sure been feeling bad about it. [00:03:34] And then that deadline gets closer.
Jenna Free [00:03:37 - 00:04:05]: [00:03:37] Wow. [00:03:37] I'm in this urgent state and I hammer it out. [00:03:41] It worked. [00:03:41] I survived this problem. [00:03:43] I survived the day. [00:03:45] But here's the question that we want to sit with. [00:03:48] If you landed right back in the same place tomorrow, did it actually work or did it just get you through the afternoon? [00:03:56] But I get it when you're in that moment thinking, I can't care about tomorrow, I just have to get through the day. [00:04:02] That is the definition of being in survival mode.
The Downside of Short-Term Fixes for ADHD
Why Short-Term Solutions Worsen ADHD Paralysis
Jenna Free [00:04:05 - 00:04:45]: [00:04:05] So we really do want to be aware of that. [00:04:07] And okay, so if these short term fixes work in the moment, but they don't make things better. [00:04:13] Eh? [00:04:14] Okay, well, I'm just trying to survive here. [00:04:16] So at least they're working in the short term. [00:04:18] But here's the thing, they're not just not helping or healing in the long term, they're actually making it worse. [00:04:25] And this is what is really difficult. [00:04:28] Because when you use urgency, intensity, guilt, shame, panic, fear, fear, the pressure from those deadlines to get yourself moving, you are putting your nervous system into a stress response. [00:04:40] So that might generate enough adrenaline to push through a task, but it always will come at a cost.Jenna Free [00:04:46 - 00:05:38]: [00:04:46] So what you're doing is you're training your system to need that level of activation just to function. [00:04:51] So a lot of people will say transitions are hard for them, or task initiation is hard for them, or in order to clean my house, I need to be in cleaning mode, I need to be in work mode to work, or all of that is because we have trained our system that I need to be at a certain intensity activation level to do anything at all. [00:05:10] And if I'm not, that means I am crashed and absolutely stuck. [00:05:15] So over time, this will snowball and get worse and worse and worse. [00:05:19] You need more urgency, more pressure, more intensity to feel like you can move at all. [00:05:24] We are training the nervous system to function in that way. [00:05:28] So some common dysregulating strategies people will use without even realizing that's what it's doing is waiting until the deadline is so close that panic does the work for you. [00:05:38] Right.
Jenna Free [00:05:38 - 00:06:30]: [00:05:38] You don't have to figure out, okay, how do I do things in a sustainable, calm way? [00:05:43] We're relying on that adrenaline. [00:05:46] We'll use negative self talk to shame yourself into starting. [00:05:50] It's like, if I feel bad enough, if I get myself in trouble enough with myself, I will move. [00:05:57] We can use like hype music or stimulation overload to kind of force us out of that freeze. [00:06:03] I know that can seem positive, but again, if we're training the system to be either frozen or in real intensity, that snowball is going to grow and grow and grow where we are flinging from intensity to freeze even more. [00:06:19] So you might race a timer to manufacture urgency. [00:06:23] I see that a lot. [00:06:23] Even recommended to ADHDers, um, when they use timers, they're not using it to like, keep track of time or support themselves.
Jenna Free [00:06:30 - 00:07:03]: [00:06:30] They're using it to create intensity and dysregulation. [00:06:36] We might catastrophize consequences and have a lot of anxiety to generate enough fear to move. [00:06:41] That may feel like it's just happening. [00:06:43] You're not doing that. [00:06:45] Our system is doing that for us. [00:06:47] Your nervous system is really smart in a lot of ways. [00:06:50] Even though it doesn't realize that, that most of your stress, and this is an assumption I'm making is coming from work deadlines, you know, tasks you want to accomplish, chores you want to do. [00:07:01] It's not coming from being chased by a bear.
Jenna Free [00:07:03 - 00:07:48]: [00:07:03] It's not coming from like, oh, if I don't go hunting for food right now, I'm going to die. [00:07:08] But it is really smart. [00:07:10] So if it thinks, oh, I need to have run from the bear energy in order to not die, it's going to use that. [00:07:19] And so we can really use that subconsciously and start getting into these habits. [00:07:24] So I just want you to notice if you're using these things for kind of that idea of, oh, this is helping me get unstuck. [00:07:32] We can use caffeine on top of an already Dysregulated nervous system. [00:07:37] And I'm not pro or con medication, but some stimulant medications can put us into a further dysregulated state. [00:07:44] And yes, we're frantic and feel productive when we're in that state.
Jenna Free [00:07:48 - 00:08:21]: [00:07:48] And it's a lot nicer than freeze. [00:07:50] I get that. [00:07:52] If I had to choose one like, okay, either be frantic and intense but getting stuff done or be frozen and stuck. [00:07:59] Yeah, I'm going to choose be intense and get stuff done. [00:08:02] But those are not your only two options. [00:08:04] And that's what we want to remember. [00:08:06] And then another thing we can do inadvertently is hyper focusing until you crash instead of stopping to keep ourselves in a sustainable energy. [00:08:16] So a lot of people can think hyperfocus is great for adhders, and that's our superpower.
Jenna Free [00:08:21 - 00:08:45]: [00:08:21] But all that's doing is using all my energy now, and that steals from our future self. [00:08:27] And you will crash. [00:08:28] It is inevitable. [00:08:29] And then we're back in the cycle again. [00:08:32] And then your nervous system is using these spikes to keep you, quote, unquote, alive to help you survive. [00:08:40] And some of these do feel productive in the moment. [00:08:42] I get it. [00:08:44] So they're seductive.
Breaking the ADHD Paralysis Cycle
Awareness of Patterns and the Cost of Intensity
Jenna Free [00:08:45 - 00:09:45]: [00:08:45] This is why we keep doing it. [00:08:46] It's like, well, you know, that intensity was better than stuckness, so I guess I'll do it again tomorrow. [00:08:52] But all of these are borrowing from the future. [00:08:55] All of these, if you think of it as a cycle, are exacerbating the cycle, making it worse and worse and worse. [00:09:02] Having you need to do them again because you're in paralysis again. [00:09:06] So that is something we need to start with, is that awareness of that string. [00:09:11] A lot of times adhders will think, wow, good thing I was really intense and hammered that out yesterday, because I'm crashed today not realizing, ew, that intensity, that dysregulation, that using of urgency and all of these things we're talking about is what created the crash. [00:09:30] As someone who was absolutely exhausted and crashed a lot of the time and in paralysis a lot of the time for many, many, many years, and who has now not experienced paralysis for two years, and I really, like, I'm functioning at a pace where I don't think I'll tip over into that.Jenna Free [00:09:45 - 00:10:07]: [00:09:45] I'm really, like, steady and sustained. [00:09:48] It's absolutely possible. [00:09:51] So your nervous system has one job to keep you alive. [00:09:55] It's a very animalistic, primal part of yourself. [00:09:58] This is the part that, you know. [00:10:00] It keeps you safe and it keeps our species going. [00:10:03] It keeps you alive. [00:10:05] Especially when we think Primal times.
Jenna Free [00:10:08 - 00:10:44]: [00:10:08] But when it perceives threat, whether that's real, whether that's something chasing you or an overdue email, it shifts into survival mode. [00:10:16] So fight, flight, freeze or fawn freeze is a big one. [00:10:21] I want you to start thinking of ADHD paralysis in particular, as I'm like a deer in the headlights right now, where biologically I'm all frozen just trying to stay alive. [00:10:32] This is not laziness. [00:10:34] This is not a choice you're making. [00:10:36] It is purely biological. [00:10:38] However, we're not at the mercy of it just because that's what's happening. [00:10:42] A lot of regulation work out there.
The Role of the Nervous System and Regulation in ADHD
Jenna Free [00:10:45 - 00:11:35]: [00:10:45] I've been doing a little bit more work about dysregulation in the workplace and in corporate settings and things like that. [00:10:52] And there are a lot of resources out there saying, hey, like corporate culture and, and how to be a good leader in corporate world is all about, you know, safety and regulation. [00:11:02] But what most people talk about is external safety and regulation. [00:11:07] And they talk as if, hey, your nervous system is primal and things are going to trigger it and there's nothing you can do about that. [00:11:14] So all you can do is try to create a really soft, safe environment. [00:11:19] Good luck with that. [00:11:21] If you have a job that has any responsibility, any time constraints, any pressure, you're going to trigger that dysregulation. [00:11:30] So we really want to start observing, oh, this is something I can work on from the inside.Jenna Free [00:11:35 - 00:12:14]: [00:11:35] This is something I can work on healing so that my nervous system isn't doing all this primal stuff where it's getting confused. [00:11:43] So with the ADHD executive function challenges, with our dopamine differences, all, all of that means our system tips into survival mode faster. [00:11:54] And we're different. [00:11:56] We are neurodivergent people living in a neurotypical world. [00:11:59] That differentness is going to trigger your nervous system when we don't feel like we fit in. [00:12:05] And again, this is a primal part. [00:12:07] This is not the reality. [00:12:09] Unique people, I would say, are much more successful these days than people who fall in line, right.
Jenna Free [00:12:14 - 00:12:41]: [00:12:14] If we want to think about the reality of our society. [00:12:17] But, but when we are just living our life and we don't feel the same, we feel different. [00:12:22] We feel, you know, oh, I got in trouble for that. [00:12:24] I was late for that. [00:12:25] I feel guilty for this. [00:12:27] That is going to trigger your nervous system into fight or flight. [00:12:29] So this is why ADHDers are so prone to. [00:12:33] It is because, yeah, we're already struggling because of ADHD in itself, but I have seen that to really improve with regulation work.
ADHD Paralysis: Not Laziness, But a Biological Response
Jenna Free [00:12:41 - 00:13:02]: [00:12:41] But Just that being different is really going to put us in this state. [00:12:45] So what we need to know is paralysis is not laziness. [00:12:48] This is freeze. [00:12:50] Your system has assessed the situation, and it's decided that shutting down is the safest response. [00:12:55] Is it logical? [00:12:56] Absolutely not. [00:12:58] Does your conscious mind know? [00:12:59] That's silly of it to do. [00:13:00] Yep. [00:13:01] But it doesn't matter.Jenna Free [00:13:02 - 00:13:32]: [00:13:02] Your primal self, the part of you that's trying to keep you alive, will always outweigh your conscious mind if it's not tuned into, like, the reality that you're safe. [00:13:14] So this is why things will happen that make no sense to you because you're probably like, hey, I know what to do. [00:13:21] It is not that hard. [00:13:22] I just want to get up and do it. [00:13:23] And your body's like, no, no, no. [00:13:26] We're going to stay frozen here to keep ourselves alive. [00:13:29] And your conscious mind is like, are you nuts? [00:13:31] This makes no sense. [00:13:32] Get up.
Jenna Free [00:13:33 - 00:14:16]: [00:13:33] This is why that's happening. [00:13:35] Nervous system is very strong until we work on it and get that power back into the conscious mind. [00:13:42] So when you layer urgency, shame, and pressure on top of a system that's already in freeze, you are not unlocking it. [00:13:50] You are confirming to your nervous system that there's something to be afraid of, and it digs in deeper. [00:13:57] So if you think of it as a car, your nervous system is so overrun, or is feeling so afraid, so much urgency, overwhelm. [00:14:07] It's like you have the pedal to the metal, right? [00:14:09] I'm going at full force. [00:14:10] This is full intensity. [00:14:12] But the car stuck in mud, so it's spinning its wheels and not going anywhere.
Analogy: The Car Stuck in Mud—Why Forcing Makes ADHD Worse
Jenna Free [00:14:16 - 00:14:47]: [00:14:16] So it feels like, oh, I need to push harder to get out of this mud. [00:14:21] Let me slam on the gas even harder. [00:14:24] That's just digging you into the mud deeper. [00:14:26] What actually would be effective is if we took our foot off the gas, found more balance, less intensity to let those tires get a grip on the road. [00:14:36] I love little analogies like that, because we understand that, right? [00:14:39] That makes sense. [00:14:40] Oh, yes. [00:14:41] To go further, to go forward, I need to slow down. [00:14:45] I need to take my foot off the gas.Jenna Free [00:14:48 - 00:15:33]: [00:14:48] It's the same thing with ADHD paralysis. [00:14:50] But this is why symptoms get worse over time. [00:14:53] For a lot of people, even when you're trying hard, even when you're using all the tools and the hacks and the tips and the tricks. [00:14:59] The hacks are typically dysregulating. [00:15:02] The intense effort is dysregulating, and. [00:15:05] And the constant survival mode is the problem when we are doing things to push that further, we are making it worse. [00:15:13] The true issue lies in our beliefs about adhd. [00:15:17] So if you are taking a short term approach to adhd, which I would say every single person is, unless they're really aware of the nervous system being wrapped up in our issues, but the short term approach, which you've been taught, so if you're using this approach, there's no need to feel bad about it.
Jenna Free [00:15:33 - 00:15:55]: [00:15:33] We just want to become aware of it. [00:15:35] The tips, the tricks, the hacks. [00:15:37] When we are using those tips, tricks and hacks, it shows me that that approach believes this will never get better. [00:15:44] Don't bother trying to heal. [00:15:46] This is how you are. [00:15:48] All you can do is get through. [00:15:50] All you can do is keep your head above water. [00:15:52] So let's just do that with these tips, tricks and hacks.
Long-Term Healing for ADHD Paralysis
Mindset Shift: Moving from Short-Term to Long-Term Healing
Jenna Free [00:15:56 - 00:16:55]: [00:15:56] However, if we have a more long term alternative approach, which we're going to talk about in a second, the mentality we're holding is, oh, ADHD symptoms can get better, I can heal this longer term so I'm not succumbing to these pitfalls all the time and having to climb my way out. [00:16:15] Like, let's just stop falling in these holes. [00:16:18] Oh, I have the awareness that the long term healing is going to be really worth it. [00:16:25] But that requires a belief and a perspective of ADHD that is a little different, which is what we do here. [00:16:31] We know ADHD symptoms can be reduced, executive functioning can be increased and life can become much more enjoyable when we're taking a long term path. [00:16:41] And that requires two things that are genuinely hard for a brain wired in survival mode. [00:16:48] So first, you have to understand that your daily struggles and your symptoms are not random. [00:16:53] They're tied directly to your nervous system state.Jenna Free [00:16:56 - 00:17:30]: [00:16:56] When you're regulated, your executive functioning improves. [00:16:59] You are much more likely to task, initiate. [00:17:02] You can transition between things. [00:17:05] People, especially my ADHD groups go, oh my gosh. [00:17:08] I always believed I'm bad at transitions, but when I get more regulated, it's like, oh, I'm just doing one thing and then I choose to do a different thing. [00:17:15] It's not as hard because we aren't needing to rev ourselves up or be in these dysregulated states to take action. [00:17:22] You can handle a full inbox or a full to do list without shutting down. [00:17:27] When you're dysregulated, all of that falls apart.
Jenna Free [00:17:30 - 00:18:08]: [00:17:30] Regardless of how many systems you have in place, regulation is not a wellness bonus. [00:17:36] On top of like all the tips and tricks and hacks to keep you productive, that is a misconception that we need to work through to really do the long term work for ADHD and actually heal things like ADHD paralysis. [00:17:50] Because if you believe regulation is about just do less, be calm, everything's fine, just don't go for things and really prioritize your well being. [00:18:01] I'm sorry if that doesn't appeal to you. [00:18:04] I get it. [00:18:04] That does not appeal to me either. [00:18:06] I'm an ambitious person. [00:18:07] I have so many ideas.
Jenna Free [00:18:09 - 00:18:57]: [00:18:09] I love achieving and doing and going after stuff. [00:18:12] However, when I'm in paralysis all the time, it's hell on earth because I have this vision of all the things I want to do in, yet I can't even shower or sweep the floor. [00:18:22] So what we need to realize is dysregulation is actually the thing stopping me from being productive, stopping me from being able to be ambitious and go after all my goals. [00:18:34] So that is a big change. [00:18:36] Regulation as the thing that's going to get you to be more productive and get you to do the things you want in life versus nicey nicey resty restyle, calm body. [00:18:47] Oh, that's all that matters is feeling nice. [00:18:50] No, that's a bonus. [00:18:52] Is a bonus of regulation work in that pursuit and in all the things you want to achieve and do.
Prioritizing Long-Term Regulation Over Quick Fixes Jenna Free [00:19:30 - 00:20:13]: [00:19:30] Your nervous system is not into that. [00:19:32] It believes survival mode is keeping you alive. [00:19:36] It thinks who gives a crap about next week? [00:19:40] What if we're dead? [00:19:42] Let's just focus on the now. [00:19:44] We'll worry about that next week. [00:19:46] However, we know that approach never ends well, especially when true survival is not in the picture. [00:19:53] Like you will survive whether you've spent more time in paralysis on the couch or not. [00:19:59] But if we can work on prioritizing the long term, you are going to see a huge difference in your symptoms and and really reduce that paralysis. [00:20:10] Again, I have eliminated paralysis in my own experience.
Jenna Free [00:20:13 - 00:21:23]: [00:20:13] That's not a promise, but it is pretty cool. [00:20:16] And I do believe that's one of the symptoms that is solely rooted in fight, flight, freeze, fawn not the ADHD brain itself, but just know that your system has been running that program of like, now is the time I have to focus on the quick fix. [00:20:34] So it's gonna take some time to shift through that and shift from that. [00:20:39] But survival mode is not protecting you, it is exhausting you. [00:20:44] When you're in survival mode, think, oh, I have a bucket of energy every day, right? [00:20:48] We do have physical limitations even as regulated humans, but I have a bucket of energy every day to use, to execute, do things, pursue things, have ideas, take action, all the things we wanna do. [00:21:02] But when we're in survival mode, it's like someone stabbed that bucket in a hundred different little pinholes and it's just spewing all over the floor. [00:21:11] Because when you are in fight or flight, it takes tons of energy to just be, to just exist. [00:21:19] For your brain to be hyper vigilant, for your nervous system to be on alert.
Jenna Free [00:21:23 - 00:21:53]: [00:21:23] All of these things require tons of energy. [00:21:27] So people always say, oh, wait, each years have less energy than neurotypical people. [00:21:31] I don't see that to be the case when we seal those holes and go, hey, I'm no longer in survival mode. [00:21:38] I'm doing the longer term work of getting out of that state. [00:21:43] Oh my gosh, look at all this energy I have to do. [00:21:45] And this is why you will be more productive. [00:21:47] It's not gonna feel harder, it's actually gonna feel easier. [00:21:50] But you're getting things done and it's such an awesome experience.
Practical Steps for Healing ADHD Paralysis
Shifting from Forcing to Regulation
Jenna Free [00:21:54 - 00:22:38]: [00:21:54] But the shift here is to do less forcing and more regulating. [00:21:58] So think of that analogy with the car as you go through your day. [00:22:02] Am I already spinning my wheels and trying to slam even harder on this gas pedal? [00:22:06] Or can I start contemplating, oh, am I actually so in overdrive that I'm stuck now even though I'm in paralysis on the couch? [00:22:17] Scrolling is what I need right now. [00:22:21] A deep breath, bring my mind back to the room. [00:22:25] If you can put that phone away from your face for a second, that will really help. [00:22:29] I know scrolling is not helping our paralysis situation. [00:22:33] Observe what my thinking is. [00:22:35] Observe that intensity and soften.Jenna Free [00:22:38 - 00:23:26]: [00:22:38] That feels very counterintuitive when you feel like, I must be lazy right now, I must need to amp myself up to get moving, but that's a great start is knowing that difference what was happening before you went into paralysis? [00:22:53] I know it's hard to see that sometimes because when we're chronically dysregulated, we're just in that state all the time. [00:23:00] But maybe you noticed, wow, I woke up. [00:23:02] I was really overwhelmed by the day and now I'm doing nothing. [00:23:05] That overwhelmed to paralysis pipeline is very strong, so we want to kind of back up. [00:23:10] Overwhelm is an intense state, right? [00:23:12] I'm thinking about all of the things at once. [00:23:14] I'm feeling rushed, I'm feeling panic, and now I'm frozen. [00:23:18] Okay, well, more intensity is not going to help here. [00:23:22] That might keep you unstuck for a few minutes or one day, but you're going to pay the piper tomorrow.
Jenna Free [00:23:27 - 00:24:10]: [00:23:27] So how can we make that shift internally, even in your awareness? [00:23:32] Oh, I see. [00:23:33] I'm in overdrive and I'm spinning my wheels. [00:23:37] How can I take my foot off the gas? [00:23:38] And obviously this is slightly intangible, but just play with that energy even for a first step and that awareness, and that is a really powerful place to start is that awareness. [00:23:51] Because once you see it, you can't unsee it and it's really cool. [00:23:54] So if this resonates and you want to start doing this long term work, I have a free workshop coming up. [00:23:59] It's called Get Unstuck for Good Healing. [00:24:01] ADHD Paralysis at the Root. [00:24:04] We're going to go deeper on what's actually driving your paralysis and what it looks like to start addressing it at the source.